One of my best girlfriends..
We have known each other for .. pretty much 15 years.
At times we’ve kept in touch daily, other times.. not much at all. But we always pick right back up where we left off. And like so many good friends who are busy with family, life and career, I always wish there were more time..
So when I see a text come in from her .. it catches my eye.
One text the other day however, REALLY stopped me in my tracks.
“Convo between me and child yesterday..Me: just knock and come in. Child: I did that once and saw something so horrifying. Something I never imagined I would see and now I can’t un-see it. I never want to risk seeing that again.”
I’m laughing. Because I can just hear her child saying this in the very wry – I’m embarrassed by my mother – but I’m cool with it – manner he often speaks. Probably not a laughing matter. But I’m laughing. I text her back.
“Oh no,” I say. “Not that.”
Then I start racking my brain to remember if I ever saw my parents in an uncompromising position as a child. Pretty sure never really saw. But did ‘hear’ on at least one occasion. Hard not to, they had a waterbed. And it did scar me as a child. For a long time.
I cringe as I send another text, thinking no way is this true, but I’m going to try and make her feel better ..
“I bet in a couple years he forgets when his own hormones kick in,” I say, along with a few other thoughts.
And I wrap it up with, “Oh my God.”
Then I think, oh that’s a good story. Because there’s NO WAY they’re the only ones this has happened to. But who talks about that??? So I ask her what she thinks. If she’d be willing to write something up for the blog.
“Sure use it,” she says. “I laugh everytime I think of it. It’s hilarious.”
She’s a writer herself. A great writer, in fact. Below is her account.
I overslept last week on a school day. My eyes sprung open at the exact minute I needed to get (child) out the door, into the car and to school on time.
Me: “Child! Are you ready to go???!!!”
Child: “Yes mom, I’ve been sitting here waiting for you.”
I’m still wearing pajamas as we get into the car and start the drive.
Once we’re on the road he says, “How could you oversleep? I have safety patrol today and if I’m late no one will be there to patrol the hallway near the janitor’s closet.”
Me: “Sorry bud. You know you can knock on the door and come in if it ever happens again.”
Child: “No. I’m not doing that.”
Me: “Why not? (Step-brother) does it all the time.”
Child: “Because I did it once and saw something so horrifying. Something I never imagined I would see and now I can’t unsee it. I never want to risk seeing that again.”
There’s a long pause as I digest what he just explained. I’m a newlywed so things can get a bit amorous.
Me: “So we were having sex?”
Child: “Yes. And I don’t want to talk about it.”
Since I have no idea when the incident occurred, I spent the next several moments wondering what, exactly, did he walk in on? Everything I came up with led to the same conclusion: a child should never, never EVER have to see his parents having shall we say, a private moment.
He hasn’t wanted to talk about it since so I haven’t pressed him. I remember that I was that young once, and horrified when I accidentally walked in on my mom and her new husband. Yuck.
I respect and understand his reaction. But maybe because I witnessed something similar when I was a kid and was still somehow able to move on and function in society, I laugh every time I think of it.
*The irony. His dad came out of the closet seven years ago, and has lived with men ever since. I can’t help but wonder, is catching me in the act is any more horrific than catching his dad?
Not that there’s anything wrong with that…